You Are Entitled to Your Anger, But You Don’t Have to Live In It

Last week, we got about 8-9 inches of snow. That might not seem like a lot depending on where you’re from, but it’s a significant amount for us. And since my husband was away, I had the pleasure of shoveling it all by myself.

Despite all of my “Let It Snow” decor, I’m actually not a huge fan of snow. A little bit is fine once or twice, but then I’m over it.

So you can imagine how I felt when it began snowing again just a few days later.

I was not happy. I was actually more than not happy — I was pissed. I was highly annoyed. I was majorly inconvenienced. I was over it.

Just when I was about to completely lose my shit, I realized something.

Getting mad because it was snowing wasn’t going to stop the snow from falling.

Yelling and cursing about the snow wasn’t going to clear it from our driveway and sidewalks.

Being angry about what was happening wasn’t going to change the fact that it was happening.

I decided to look for something positive in the situation and make the most of it.

I decided not to let my anger toward the snow prevent me from seeing the beauty of it.

I decided to pick up a shovel and get to work.

Now, I’m not an advocate of stuffing all of your emotions into one pot and then putting a lid on it because I promise you, it will boil over eventually. But I’m also not an advocate of allowing your emotions to control your life and your actions. And I’m not an advocate of sitting in your negative emotions for too long because that’s just not productive.

Please hear this:

Being angry at what is happening to your loved one will not stop it from happening.

Being angry that there’s nothing you can do about it won’t clear the plaques and tangles from their mind.

Being angry that your loved one has Alzheimer’s will not change the fact that they have Alzheimer’s.

Friends, anger is a normal and justified reaction to this disease. It’s okay to feel it and even to express it, but you can’t sit in it for too long. That’s no way for you to live.

So get mad, yes.

Yell and curse, sure.

Stomp your feet and slam the door, why not?

But then, pick up a shovel and get to work.

You are entitled to your anger, but you don’t have to live in it.