Punishing Yourself for Your Loved One’s Suffering Won’t Do Anyone Any Good

I felt so guilty living my life while my mom was suffering from Alzheimer’s and my dad was overwhelmed with her care that I just simply stopped living my life. I still feel guilty that I didn’t have to take care of her from the minute I woke up until the minute I went to … Continue reading Punishing Yourself for Your Loved One’s Suffering Won’t Do Anyone Any Good

We Need to Stop Minimizing the Grief of an Expected Loss

How many times have you heard someone say, “My loved one died. Well, she was sick and we knew it was coming, but still...”? Why do we feel the need to offer that explanation? Why do we feel the need to minimize our loss by saying that it was expected? Why do we diminish our … Continue reading We Need to Stop Minimizing the Grief of an Expected Loss

Your Decisions As a Caregiver Do Not Cause Your Loved One to Decline. Alzheimer’s Does.

Your decisions as a caregiver do not cause your loved one to decline. The disease causes your loved one to decline. We had a very hard time making certain decisions for my mom’s care. Looking back and reflecting on those decisions has allowed me to see that making those decisions was not the cause of … Continue reading Your Decisions As a Caregiver Do Not Cause Your Loved One to Decline. Alzheimer’s Does.

When Your Loved One Dies, You Don’t Just Grieve the Death. You Grieve the Journey.

(The post below was written on April 14, 2020. My mom passed on April 4, 2020.) The last few days have been rough. Now that my mom’s service is over, I feel like the reality of her being gone is setting in. It feels like everything over the last ten years is hitting me all … Continue reading When Your Loved One Dies, You Don’t Just Grieve the Death. You Grieve the Journey.

I Can’t Believe We’re Still Here. I Can’t Believe We’re Still Doing This.

(The post below was written on March 12, 2020. My mom passed on April 4, 2020.) Almost exactly two months ago, I went to my parents’ house and realized that everything had changed. My mom and dad had a really bad week and it showed. It was evident that my mom had taken a sharp … Continue reading I Can’t Believe We’re Still Here. I Can’t Believe We’re Still Doing This.