During the first few years of my mom's battle with Alzheimer's, I was an emotional wreck. I cried all the time. I got angry and overreacted a lot. I had really big emotions over the smallest things. It wasn't until I became familiar with the terms ambiguous loss and ambiguous grief that my emotional overwhelm … Continue reading Ep 10: Ambiguous Loss and Ambiguous Grief
Tag: grief
Ep 9: Your Anger Is Justified, But It’s Not Serving You
Have you ever felt angry that your loved one has Alzheimer's or dementia? Do you feel angry when you think about everything you have lost and how much your life has changed? Are you angry that your family has to go through this while others don't? I used to feel angry about all of those … Continue reading Ep 9: Your Anger Is Justified, But It’s Not Serving You
Ep 8: Using Gratitude to Cope with What You’re Going Through
For a long time during my mom's Alzheimer's battle, I mostly focused on what I had lost--not what I still had. That left me feeling sad, hopeless, and depressed almost all of the time. At some point, I decided that I needed to do something different to better cope with what I was going through. … Continue reading Ep 8: Using Gratitude to Cope with What You’re Going Through
My Mom Would Be Proud of the Woman I’ve Become
We buried my mom three years ago today. I want to hug both women in the photo below, but the girl on the right—I want to grab her and squeeze her and tell her she’s going to be okay. Getting ready for her mom’s funeral, wearing her mom’s sweater in her mom’s favorite color. Standing … Continue reading My Mom Would Be Proud of the Woman I’ve Become
My Thoughts on Grief Three Years After My Mom Died
Three years ago today, I was having coffee for the first time in our new house, when my dad called to tell me that my mom had died. It seemed so unexpected, but in reality, it was not. On that day and the days that immediately followed, the grief was fresh and raw. I tried … Continue reading My Thoughts on Grief Three Years After My Mom Died
Grief Never Goes Away, But You Can Feel Two Things At Once
I was my dad’s plus one for his best friend’s daughter’s wedding on Saturday night. When my dad got the invitation in the mail, I knew how much he wanted to go, but I also knew that he would never go by himself. When I saw that he was allowed to bring a guest, I … Continue reading Grief Never Goes Away, But You Can Feel Two Things At Once
Life Is Meant For Living
During my mom’s ten-year battle with Alzheimer’s, I put my life on hold in so many ways that I basically stopped living it altogether. I did the absolute bare minimum that I needed to do to get by. I didn’t have the energy to do anything more than that. At the time, it was what … Continue reading Life Is Meant For Living
It’s Been Two Years Since My Mom Died And I Am Still Her Daughter
Two years. Today marks two years since my mom died. That doesn’t even seem possible. The time seems to both have flown by and stood still. In the days after my mom died, I remember thinking that before I knew it a week would go by. And then a month, a year, two years. I … Continue reading It’s Been Two Years Since My Mom Died And I Am Still Her Daughter
It’s My Turn to Live a Whole Entire Life Without My Mom
I turned 37 years old the other day. Although this was only my second birthday without my mom here, anyone who has experienced Alzheimer’s firsthand knows that I’ve been celebrating it without her for a long, long time. It would have been so easy to deduce myself to a puddle of tears all day long, … Continue reading It’s My Turn to Live a Whole Entire Life Without My Mom
When You Are Grieving, Doing Nothing Is Everything
After my mom died, I had a friend who would text me regularly to check in and see how I was doing. She would always ask, “How’s today coming along?” One day I told her how I felt lazy and unproductive because I had spent the last several weeks doing basically nothing. I told her … Continue reading When You Are Grieving, Doing Nothing Is Everything