Last week I wrote a post about how I’m actually feeling excited about the holiday season in spite of it being the first one without my mom. That’s all real and true. I’m not dreading the holidays at all this year. I’m actually really excited for Thanksgiving and Christmas. But there’s something else that’s been … Continue reading I Am Dreading the Months Leading Up to the First Anniversary of My Mom’s Death
Tag: end stage Alzheimer’s
It’s Okay to Go Slow and Do What Feels Familiar
I set out to go for a short run in my neighborhood this morning. The weather was pretty gloomy, as it has been for the last few days, but I opted to run outside because I knew I needed it. This year has been heavy for everyone for many reasons, but for me it has … Continue reading It’s Okay to Go Slow and Do What Feels Familiar
Six Months Without You
Dear Mom, It has been six months today since you passed away. There are still times when I think about you or look at a picture of you and I have to remind myself that you’re gone. It just doesn’t seem possible. It’s hard for me to wrap my mind around the fact that you … Continue reading Six Months Without You
Little Things I Do Every Day to Cope With Grief
We moved into our new house six months ago today. My mom passed away six months ago tomorrow. It’s hard to believe that much time has gone by. It all feels like just yesterday. It has been a challenging six months, but I have gotten through it. Although there are still days when I feel … Continue reading Little Things I Do Every Day to Cope With Grief
We Need to Stop Minimizing the Grief of an Expected Loss
How many times have you heard someone say, “My loved one died. Well, she was sick and we knew it was coming, but still...”? Why do we feel the need to offer that explanation? Why do we feel the need to minimize our loss by saying that it was expected? Why do we diminish our … Continue reading We Need to Stop Minimizing the Grief of an Expected Loss
You Cannot Control the Timing of Your Loved One’s Death
The morning my mom died, I rode in the passenger seat of my own car as my husband drove us to my parents’ house. His car was in the shop, so we had to take mine. We had just moved into a new house in a new area the day before, so we had to … Continue reading You Cannot Control the Timing of Your Loved One’s Death
Your Decisions As a Caregiver Do Not Cause Your Loved One to Decline. Alzheimer’s Does.
Your decisions as a caregiver do not cause your loved one to decline. The disease causes your loved one to decline. We had a very hard time making certain decisions for my mom’s care. Looking back and reflecting on those decisions has allowed me to see that making those decisions was not the cause of … Continue reading Your Decisions As a Caregiver Do Not Cause Your Loved One to Decline. Alzheimer’s Does.
We Are Sad and We Miss My Mom, But She Is Better Off
(The post below was written on July 1, 2020. My mom passed on April 4, 2020.) My dad and I went out to one of our favorite restaurants for lunch yesterday. I can’t even count the number of birthdays, anniversaries, Mother’s Days, Father’s Days, going aways, and welcome homes we’ve celebrated at this restaurant. In … Continue reading We Are Sad and We Miss My Mom, But She Is Better Off
I’m Not Moving On, But I’m Moving Forward
(The post below was written on May 21, 2020. My mom passed on April 4, 2020.) This Saturday will mark seven weeks since my mom passed. It is still so hard to believe. Life is weird, but death is weirder. I get it. I know what it means. I understand. But it is still so … Continue reading I’m Not Moving On, But I’m Moving Forward
I Felt Closer to My Mom When She No Longer Knew Who I Was
(The post below was written on May 19, 2020. My mom passed on April 4, 2020.) One thing I see over and over again on social media, especially in support groups, is how devastating it is when your loved one doesn’t know who you are anymore. I vividly remember the first time my mom looked … Continue reading I Felt Closer to My Mom When She No Longer Knew Who I Was