Punishing Yourself for Your Loved One’s Suffering Won’t Do Anyone Any Good

I felt so guilty living my life while my mom was suffering from Alzheimer’s and my dad was overwhelmed with her care that I just simply stopped living my life. I still feel guilty that I didn’t have to take care of her from the minute I woke up until the minute I went to … Continue reading Punishing Yourself for Your Loved One’s Suffering Won’t Do Anyone Any Good

We Need to Stop Minimizing the Grief of an Expected Loss

How many times have you heard someone say, “My loved one died. Well, she was sick and we knew it was coming, but still...”? Why do we feel the need to offer that explanation? Why do we feel the need to minimize our loss by saying that it was expected? Why do we diminish our … Continue reading We Need to Stop Minimizing the Grief of an Expected Loss

My Mom Didn’t Know Who I Was, But She Knew Me Better Than Anyone Else Ever Will

When I would tell someone my mom had Alzheimer’s, the first thing they usually asked was, “Does she know who you are?” There was a time when I could confidently answer, “Yes, she does.” People always seemed so relieved to hear that. “Oh, that’s good!” While it was good that my mom still knew who … Continue reading My Mom Didn’t Know Who I Was, But She Knew Me Better Than Anyone Else Ever Will

Your Decisions As a Caregiver Do Not Cause Your Loved One to Decline. Alzheimer’s Does.

Your decisions as a caregiver do not cause your loved one to decline. The disease causes your loved one to decline. We had a very hard time making certain decisions for my mom’s care. Looking back and reflecting on those decisions has allowed me to see that making those decisions was not the cause of … Continue reading Your Decisions As a Caregiver Do Not Cause Your Loved One to Decline. Alzheimer’s Does.